Thursday, May 19, 2011

14 Weeks

How I'm feeling: I definitely feel pregnant. I am still having heart burn which is very annoying. I also have round ligament pains once in a while and lately I have been getting lots of headaches. I feel lucky because i am able to sleep without getting up in the night. With Zoey getting up never went away it just got worse so I'm appreciating this baby being off my bladder. 

Weight gain: 2 lbs total. I officially don't fit in my normal pants anymore. I can wear them but have to either rubber band the button or use a bella band. I lots of maternity clothes so I don't have to buy many but they are a little big still.

Cravings: still popsicles and something I forgot on my list last week is sushi. Vegetarian sushi that is. we have a great place near our house that makes amazing veggie rolls.

Dr Apt: No Dr. apt this week, but my mom and I got very needed massages on Tuesday. It helped relax my muscles and get some of the tension in my neck and shoulders out.

Friday, May 13, 2011

13 Weeks

I am currently 13 weeks pregnant. It still feels a little unreal.

How I'm feeling: pretty good. I have had some pretty bad heartburn but nothing else too bad. I am sleeping a little better now which helps a lot. I feel tired all the time but I was like that with Zoey too.

Weight gain: 1 lb. I am hoping I won't gain very much this time.

Cravings: Lately I have really wanted Stuffing with cranberry sauce, Popsicles and fruit of all kinds. Luckily I haven't really had many food aversions yet.

Dr Apt: I had a check up on Monday. My mom came with me since Mike couldn't. The doctor said everything looked good after the cerclage and we got to hear the baby's heartbeat. Mike and I heard it at my 12 week ultrasound but not for very long.

Monday, May 9, 2011

Mothers Day..

My Mothers day was pretty low key.  I didn't really do a whole lot. I got up watched TV and went to my parents for dinner. I didn't realize that mothers day would be a little hard for me. I guess it kinda hit me Sat night that I am celebrating a mothers day without my baby here in my arms. As I was going to bed I took a minute and looked at the pictures of Zoey we have at the end of the hall outside our door.  I'm sure being pregnant and emotional doesn't make it easier but it does make me sad to think about. I keep telling myself that next year should be better. I guess I am nervous that it won't be, but as scared as I am of having another loss I am doing well with staying positive. Part of that I think is because my doctor is very positive and attentive.

Mothers day for me is probably similar to many people who have had a loss. It is a reminder that although we don't have a baby here to take care of we are all still moms. I didn't expect people to wish me a happy mothers day or anything. I know for many people who haven't been in this situation it may seem awkward or an area that people aren't sure what to say. Mike sent me a beautiful bouquet of flowers which was so thoughtful. It was a pleasant surprise when I got my first Happy Mothers day from a friend in a text message. Her message said "Happy Mothers day girl, for your angel and the one on the way". It was simple but really made me smile. It is a nice reminder that other people think of it the same way Mike and I do.

My mothers day bouquet

Tuesday, May 3, 2011


Yesterday I got up around 7:45 and called L&D at 8. They said come in at 9:30. Mike and I got some things together and headed over to Stanford. We live about 40 minutes from the hospital and with traffic it took us a little over an hour to get there. I got there and they got me right into a gown and bed. I was in a room with 4 other women separated by curtains. Most of the women that came and went while i was there were having c-sections. Once i was there things started going pretty fast. I got an IV, then the doctors came in to talk to me and the anesthesiologist came in, all while the nurses were asking me a million questions. We asked if Mike could come with me into the operating room and although I'm sure we could have pushed a little more for them to let him they said it wasn't their normal procedure so no. They wheeled me into the operating room which is the same room they do C-sections in. It was really cold and bright. They had me switch beds and sit up for an epidural.

This time it was a short term epidural so it was just a one time shot not a catheter like you get during delivery. It took a little while for it to kick in all the way (they had to tilt the bed in different directions and the Anesthesiologist had to hold me knees up for a while but it worked). The whole epidural thing seems like something most women either don't talk about or forget about because they are in labor. From my experience this process sucks. the first time was exceptionally bad but this time was better at least. In case you don't know they start with a few shots to help numb the area then they insert the shot or catheter with the medication. This whole process hurts a lot. It is very uncomfortable and feels like someone is pinching your back hard. During the procedure I couldn't help but tell them when it was hurting I didn't scream but I was saying oww.. Luckily the anesthesiologist was in a good mood and was singing and stuff so it helped me to relax.

Once the doctor got there they put my legs into these straps that were held above the bed with poles. It was a little weird but I couldn't feel anything. All i could feel during the whole thing was pressure. When someone touched my legs or stomach it felt like they were just pushing lightly. The whole procedure from when I left mike to when I got out was about an hour.

I ended up being there until about 4pm because it took that long for the epidural to wear off enough for me to go to the bathroom. I felt sore kinda like someone punched me in the stomach until this morning. The Dr. gave me a prescription for some pain killers to help keep my uterus relaxed. I also had some spotting which is all normal after a cerclage is placed.

There are two types of cerclage one is less invasive and is placed around the cervix and pulled tight to keep it closed. The other type is where they have to go through the cervix and stitch it shut. Lucky I was able to have the first one. The Doctor said everything went really well. But there is still a chance that the cerclage won't work. In that case they could add a second one. I have a check up next week and then I will start seeing the doctor or ultrasound tech every 2 weeks.